Chip on the shoulder or shoot from the hip? It's all in the attitude
The glucose chip is attached near my hip and so far is holding. I think.
My overnight blood sugars were rock steady last night. Unfortunately, my CGM was experiencing bouts of lows. Starting at 3 am it woke me up either 3 or 4 times. The first time I dutifully checked my sugar, thinking, "Yes!" what a great feature, only to stick myself and learn I was a perfect 107. Needless to say, by the 3rd time around or so, at about 5:30 this morning, I was feeling that the CGM was a little too needy.
Which brings me to a comment editor Liz said yesterday, about how this device kind of seemed like those high school experiments where you get to take care of an egg, or doll or, oddly, a bag of flour (although I am guessing that last one is in the poorer school districts heah in Maine) to see what a full-time job parenting actually is.
But she's right. This thing has to stay within 5 feet of me at all times. It goes to the bathroom with me, it curls up beside me at night, it needs to be fed data every few hours. At the office coffeepot this morning, I had a brief moment of panic when I thought I didn't have the CGM with me (I did). And I am constantly checking in with it to see what it is doing and if it needs anything.
It's getting a little annoying, truth be told. I like to roll a little more independently.
But then I suppose it's an apt metaphor. Like an infant or a CGM, I cannot leave the diabetes behind. Everywhere I go, there it is. I don't get a day off, or hire a sitter for a night out. If I take a vacation, it comes along like an uninvited guest. At times it has worn me down or stressed me out. And it's very, very expensive.
But, as with anything else, you learn as you go, you make adjustments and you see the positives, alongside the negatives. Above all, you learn to laugh at yourself. Especially at 3 am.
Type 1, 11.5 years